Every now and then, a credit card offer gets me so mad, I want everyone to know about what a rip-off it is. So please help me spread the word about this egregious come-on: The Upfront Reward Visa Platinum card from Universal Savings Bank.

To be approved for the card, which comes with a 9.99%, 10.99%, or 11.99% interest rate depending on your credit report, you have to transfer a balance of $5,000. There won&39;t be a fee on the transfer and the bank says you&39;ll get your reward "right away," which will be your choice of one of the following:

• A name brand notebook computer (e.g., Dell and HP)
• An HD flat screen television (Philips and Sharp)
• An Oreck vacuum cleaner
• An $800 gift card for golfing paraphernalia

Don&39;t owe $5,000 on another card? No worries. Universal Savings will give you a cash advance of up to $2,500. There won&39;t be a fee and you&39;ll pay only 9.99% to 11.99% interest on it – not the 19.99% you&39;ll have to pay if you take out other cash advances.

The bank says it&39;s already given away over 75,000 upfront rewards, and that there&39;s "never been a credit card offer quite like the Universal Savings Bank Upfront Reward Visa Platinum offer. And because you&39;re a savvy consumer, we know you&39;ll agree."

I don&39;t agree at all!

Three major catches:

1. The rewards aren&39;t worth the $850 or so the bank says they are. It&39;s easy to find the  merchandise online for a lot less money. For example, I just found one of the notebook computers for under $500 and one of the televisions for $580.

I was just beginning to research the prices of the other rewards when I came upon a great article by Kevin LoVecchio, who received an offer for the Upfront Rewards card in the mail a few months ago:  High-Risk, Low-Reward: The Perfect Investment? While some of the particulars have changed, his reporting shows that the deals are lousy.

2. You have to maintain a balance of $3,500 for 18 months! According to the bank, "If your balance falls below $3,500 at any time during the first 18 months after your account is open, you will be in default and your account will be assessed a one-time fee of $600."

Ouch! Or as Kevin puts it:

"Imagining that you can perfectly manage your purchases and payments to maintain the exact $3,500 minimum monthly balance, you get significantly overvalued computers and accessories at an out-of-pocket purchase price that is either break-even (at best) or hundreds of dollars more than simply purchasing online (at worst).  Make one mistake along the line and you can add in an additional $600 expense, paid right into the greedy pockets of the credit card companies."

By the way, that $600 doesn&39;t include the interest you&39;ll have paid on the $3,500 balance, which could amount to around $650, if you kept the $3,500 balance for 17 months before you blew it and paid back some of that amount.

3. You won&39;t get your reward right away. When the bank says "right away," it means after you&39;ve been approved and the balance transfer goes through, which could take up to a month. You should receive your reward "within weeks" after that.  I don&39;t know about you, but that&39;s not exactly my definition of right away.

The bank says it&39;s "brought a breath of fresh air" with Upfront Rewards. I beg to differ. I think it stinks.